Did you know it is possible to download your Netflix viewing history? It is …. terrifying and embarrassing. I wanted to see what I had watched since we went into lockdown mid-March and instead I ended up in a shame spiral with a list of nearly every movie and episode of a show that I’ve watched since 2009 (and I say “nearly” because there are random gaps in the list). The spreadsheet has 3138 lines….

As a side note, the first entry is for “Party Down: Season 1: Pepper McMasters Singles Seminar” on 6/9/09. Which is an amazing first entry and explains plenty about me.

For whatever reason, the spreadsheet is missing Jan 18 through April 5, 2020, which is interesting because that is the time during which COVID deaths began to rise and we realized shit must be getting serious because sports got cancelled.

It would be interesting to know what I was watching during that time, but I’m too lazy to see if I can figure it out. I’m also too lazy to look up what I watched on Hulu, Amazon Prime, my DVR, etc, so … Here we go!

April

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My Netflix viewing history for April:

• Tiger King ?
• Community Season 1 ?
• Nailed It! Season 4 ?
• Ozark Season 3 ?
• Kim’s Convenience Season 1 ?
• Too Hot to Handle Season 1 ?

Ah, Tiger King… harkening back to a “simpler time” in our lives where Netflix Party seemed novel and possibly fun, and we still had it in us to be somewhat entertained by watching dumpster fires. You know, that time when it naively seemed fairly funny and harmless to laugh at how silly and weird middle America was….

And also when we thought it was super funny to watch horny people have to go a whole four weeks without physical interaction with someone else…. and which has become decidedly less funny since many of us have now gone five months without physical interaction.

Then ya throw in a bit of comedic nostalgia rewatch of Community, a little optimistic “maybe I’ll use this time home to bake more” with Nailed It and the delightful grittiness of Ozark, and that gives you the mood of April.

May

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I watched:

• Married at First Sight Season 9 ?
• Extraction ?
• Workin’ Moms Season 4 ?
• The Big Flower Fight ?
• Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt: Kimmy vs. the Reverend ?
• The Wrong Missy ?
• The Lovebirds ?
• Schitt’s Creek Season 1 ?

Oh May — a month characterized by the need to believe that whimsy and love and hope were still possible. Because there was no way we were on a continuing slide toward ever-deepening chaos and loss of life, right? This would surely be over before I was forced to give up any idea of leaving my house for summer, RIGHT?!

The whimsy of The Big Flower Fight that gave us beautiful flower installments, but more importantly brought the fashion stylings of Henck and Yan (Note: when I get to leave my house again, I most def will be wearing stuffed animals as hats. Not because I think it will be on trend, but because after months of laying on my couch I will certainly want to draw attention up and away from the one pair of stained sweatpants that I’ll be wearing that still fit).

Not to mention, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt and Titus taking us on a wild and playful choose your own adventure with the Reverend.

The beautiful Issa Rae and the recently jacked up Kumail Nanjiani giving us misadventures that would surely end in love in The Lovebirds. Workin’ Moms and Schitt’s Creek providing me those laughs while characters navigate challenging personal times.

And, some other shit I probably shouldn’t have bothered watching, but sometimes it’s nice just to have something on in the background.

June

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I watched:

• Space Force ?
• Schitt’s Creek Seasons 2, 3, 4 and 5 ?
• Queer Eye Season 5 ?
• When They See Us ?
• Into the Night ?
• Angel Has Fallen ?
• Giri / Haji ?
• Marcella Season 2 ?
• The Politician Season 2 ?
• Disclosure ?
• Eurovision Song Contest: The Story of Fire Saga ?
• Crazy Delicious ?
• Community Season 2 ?

Then we get to good old June 2020…. I got laid off at the end of May. It became clear that we were in this for the long haul and that what had once been the amusing Tiger King dumpster fires of yore were now almost literally being delivered as little flaming baggies full of dog shit to our doorstep every day.

So, June’s watching reflects two pretty distinct moods: 1) please for the love of god is there something that can provide me even one ounce of humor and take away the darkness that plagues my soul?; and, 2) now allow me to wallow in gloom, horror and/or the fucked-upness of our society.

July

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I watched:

• After Life Season 2 ?
• Community Season 3-5 ?
• The Circle ?
• Dark Seasons 1-3 ?
• Indian Matchmaking ?
• The Old Guard ?
• Love on the Spectrum ?
• Warrior Nun ?

About midway through July marked the point at which I became so desperate for content, I was willing to watch anything. Looking at you The Circle!

However, in one way or another, these shows are almost all about people looking to connect to others and find where and how they fit in in the world. Which I think sums up pretty well the exploration so many of us are doing at a time when we feel so disconnected from others and are desperately concerned about what is happening in the country.

August

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My Netflix viewing history for August:

• The Umbrella Academy Season 2 ?
• Community Season 6-7 ?
• The Office Seasons 1-3 ?
• Glow Up Season 2 ?
• Teenage Bounty Hunters ?
• Stateless ?
• Project Power ?
• Baewatch ?
• Work It ?
• Cobra Kai ?

August seems to be a bit of a combination of the moods of June and July. Getting my laughs in with The Office, Teenage Bounty Hunters and Cobra Kai (which I already watched on Youtube Red when it came out, but will watch again because I need the nostalgia boost).

Finding my own version of social connection by watching kind of silly movies like Project Power and Work It at the same time as friends and texting furiously throughout.

Realizing that seasons 6 and 7 of Community are honestly just horrible, but needing to prove to myself that I still had the will and stamina to see something through to completion.

And, watching Baewatch (and no I didn’t misspell Baywatch) because August is the point at which I apparently officially drop any appearance of having standards at all…

Postscript

It has been a weird experience to rewatch Community and The Office (US version). I recall that they both had cringeworthy moments, but there is something about watching them now and in a short period of time that is suuuuuuuper cringe-inducing. Like… when you watch the sexist, racist, homophobic, ableist, ageist, sizeist, etc, “jokes” all back-to-back with characters that often don’t seem to grow much, it is pretty rough. And for why things like that matter, I really recommend watching Disclosure. Because it’s really enlightening to think about all the messages we have passively received from what we watch about what is acceptable and about all different kinds of people.